the Leathermines

The beginning of the Chronicles of the Midlands starts with The Slave Warrior - Please consider Tribute to keep the Web Mistress in chocolate

 

The muffled sounds of snowfall on the thick glass woke Laun, but even though snow meant it was warmer, it did not make her want to get out of bed that early in the morning.  She was surrounded by her Loves and household and she was warm and comfortable.  Her habit of getting up early in the morning to exercise was what had woken her, but she was not willingly moving from the bed that morning.  

She was tired of getting up so damnedably early.

There was movement beside her and eyes opened.  The low night lamp made Fount’s grey eyes deep and dark that morning.  The sleepiness was blinked away and Laun could see the smile at the corner of his eyes.

“Good morning, Husband.”

Fount’s hand went between the covers and found her arm.  “Good morning, Wife.”

There was movement and a yawn on the other side of her.  Both Fount and Laun moved as Edgar pulled the blanket back and looked at them in the dim morning light.

“Good morning, my Lord.”

He smiled and chuckled, saying, “Good morning, my Lady.”  He rolled slightly and their lips touched.  Laun giggled as she felt Fount’s hair tickle her shoulder as he started to kiss his way to her neck, aiming eventually for her mouth as he moved under the covers.  Edgar felt the younger man move and propped himself up enough to be able to intercept him.

Fount found he was being kissed by a slightly scruffy man instead of the woman he was aiming for.  His eyes opened fully and then he leaned into the kiss.  He pulled back, a lopsided smile on his lips.  “Good morning, Love.”

Another voice came from under the covers, a tired tone not just from the early morning heard by all as she said, “Do you three have to do this every morning?”  There were many chuckles and giggles in the room as those who had been trying to be asleep could not hold the laughter back.

Laun had a hand on both of her Loves, her husbands, as she spoke over Fount’s shoulder to Ali.  “It’s only been a month.  I’m sure it’ll grow old after a while.”

The smiling face of Ali came up and then leaned on Fount’s shoulder.  “Some of us still need sleep.  It’s hard being pregnant.”

Laun sat up, letting in the cold of the room under the blankets.  She looked over to the cradle, counting heads of the sleeping babies.  Ash and Sable were there, still asleep, Nan’s Tiss also crowding into the wooden cradle.  Laun let herself get pulled back into the warmth under the blankets and said, “Get the sleep now, Ali.  You won’t get any after it comes.”

“She.”  Fount was definite in his tone.  Ali’s hand was on his shoulder and patted him, nodding.

There was other movement in the room, a few people braving the winter cold in the tower room to head for the privy before the others.  Tunics and breeches and even boots were pulled under the covers to be put on before completely breaking the warmth bubble around them.  Laun wanted to stay under the quilts and sheepskins and linens, but she knew that the little light coming to them through the winter snow meant it was really later than it might have looked in the gloom of the room.

Grumbles followed her out of the bed, but none of those around her ventured further than filling the warm hole she had left in the bedding.  Laun moved to the foot of the bed and then crawled over the various feet and legs that were there to get to the lower mat, also spread with bodies ignoring the morning.  She stepped over them and grabbed the long tunic she had discarded the night before, still laying over the arm of the chair in the corner.

She shivered as she paced up and down the rug along the wall, warming herself up and focusing on the routine she wanted to do that morning.  She glanced over when she heard a small sigh, the covers moving as bodies started to move against each other.  Laun smiled slightly and turned back to the wet snow covered window, seeing a feathered pattern on the inside of the rippled glass from the cold leaching in.

Laun stretched as much as she could and then went to her first position.  Arms up in front of her, legs spread a little apart, leaning forward as if she was about to overbalance herself.  She went through the first part of the kata, flowing as much as she could while unsuccessfully ignoring the cold in the room.  She did not do the leg sweeps or kicks.  She did not spread her arms as wide as she should have.  She made it through the routine once.

Silar and Evan came in carrying a tray with hot tea and some of the trenchers left from the evening meal.  Laun had a mug in her hands, warming her fingers and then her stomach as the men took their places on the rug with her.  The hot tea helped to chase some of the cold away, but she could still feel the winter trying to sap her strength.

“Which routine were you doing this morning, Mistress?”  Silar’s dark, almond shaped eyes looked at her, his watchfulness partially in his role of trainer and teacher, partially his interest in her.  He saw how she was not bending her right knee quite as much as her left.  Her hands hurt her as she warmed them on the pottery mug, though she would not say anything about it.  He caught the scent of her husbands on her, though not as much of her own scent as he would expect.

“The open hand balance for the second kata.”  She took another sip and went to first position.

Silar nodded and faced her.  “You have some difficulty with the sweep after the lunge.”

Evan was stretching, trying to not touch the stone wall under the window more than for balance.  “Everyone has problems with that move.  It isn’t natural.”

“Which is why we practice.”  Silar took the mug from Laun’s hands and they began, Silar taking the part against Laun to help her use her body and learn in the cold morning.

Many repetitions later, the only people left in the room were the three on the rug, Ali and the babies.  The main fire in the tower had been stoked and the floor had warmed while they were practicing, tunics coming off as the flush and sweat of the morning’s exercise ritual was pushed through.  Laun begged off yet another go-through of the kata when Sable started to fuss, making Tiss start to wiggle and fuss.

The twins were still mainly nursing, though if you gave Ash a hunk of the trencher, she would suck on that until it was a soggy mess all over her and her sister.  Sable would suck on the bread for a while, but once it was at a certain consistency, she would toss it away.  Laun had been taking care of Tiss while Nan and Jake were pulling watch duty at the barricade, the larger, older child happily chewing on the torn trencher that Laun gave her as the younger babies nursed.

Ali held one baby as the other suckled.  Her breasts had grown from almost nothing to a small handful in the seven months she had been with child.  She was not used to them and would often bump them against things as she was working, unaccustomed pain leading to flares of temper and dropping things.  Her belly, too, though it was not nearly the same size as Laun was with the twins.  Edgar had taken council with Fount and the other horsemen and had convinced Ali that she was endangering herself and the horses by staying as a stablehand.  There had been some coercing, but she agreed, stepping into the role of Laun’s full-time attendant.  She absently held her breast as she watched Laun breastfeed, a protective action more than for pleasure.

The babies were fed and changed.  Laun and Ali dressed, one in tunic and breeches, one in a long, loose tunic.  The thick woolen slippers that were felted out of the wool that was not quite right for spinning held the cold away, though both women had two sets of boot socks on as insulation.  Silar and Evan waited and helped the women haul the babies and other things back through the keep to the Great Hall.

It was mid-morning.  Winter pushed some things around so that those who would wake at first light would be waking as the rest of the household would normally wake.  First meal had become a combination of first and nooning, with the household meeting in the middle.  Most of the soldiers from the Fourth Logistics and Supply Company, known as the Princess’ Fourth, were on the Salam-Dir lands, and because of the cold and snow were huddled inside with the rest of the populace and not in their tents.

A small call to salute was sounded and those soldiers who were warm and awake enough stood and saluted, though Laun accepted the sloppy salutes from the men sitting at the tables, hot tea in hand, as well.  More tea and a thick slice of bread with a smear of honeyed butter was in Laun’s hands as she set the basket with Sable down.  Laun thanked the kitchen staff with a smile and a touch on his hand before taking a bite and a sip.

Laun was not sure how many people were in the Great Hall that morning.  She could count that high, but it would take time.  She thought that almost all of the two hundred people on the land had crowded into the Great Hall, the fires at either end not the only source of heat with that mass of bodies.

There was a quieting as Laun turned, looking at all the faces she could see.  The meeting ritual started like this, calm, quiet, focused.  It always ended loud and chaotic.  She was tired of that.

“It’s snowing!”  There was laughter and a call of, “Again!” from the crowd.  Laun motioned towards the voice with her mug and smiled after she took another sip.  “It was an early snow this year, almost a month before First Feast.  We have been under snow for close to two months now.  We just got back our Chatelaine and our List Master from the Capitol City in the last lull and they have brought news.”

Laun turned and found the eyes of Geralk who motioned that she should tell the news.  She nodded and continued to turn.  “Word from Rosemond is that She has gone through a tribunal and has been sent to the Island Principality to live out the rest of her life.”  There was a cheer that roared through the Great Hall.  Laun raised her mug in salute and then to focus people to calm and quiet again.

“Along with Lady Engrid, we have had confirmation that a battalions’ worth of Rosemond troops have been safely escorted across the low plains and are now on Rosemond land.”  Soldiers and civilians alike nodded at the news.  “There are still some of their regulars and mercs in the Midlands, but Falmir had the sense to round as many up as possible and they are in Hamlis, awaiting transport by the Rosemond Navy.”

People looked like they wanted to cheer, be enthusiastic, but news such as this always came with at least some caution to it.  There was a clearing of a throat and Edgar stepped forward.  Laun nodded to him and he rumbled out, “Other news from the King and his Father is that trade with Rosemond and Myrned as well as the countries from the other continent will be close to what it was before the coup...”  He looked at Laun and had a wicked smile.  “Except for the reversal of bathing goods.”

She scrunched up her face before saying, “It’s about time we were able to sell something to Rosemond that isn’t our land!”  There was laughter from many, the loudest from Orgia.

“That reminds me...”  Many people shrunk from the sound of the chatelaines’ voice, gone for over a month.  “Whoever thought it was a good idea to put Hutberries into the tallow had better fess-up.  It is going to take several millings before we can use it for candles or soap.”  Orgia turned to Laun and said, “But I like the idea of using the silt from the Grey in some of the trade soaps.  It seems to get a nice glow to the skin-”

A voice from the back of the people called out, “Who’d think you would get married and vain!”  There was more laughter through the room.  Laun held up her hand and asked if there were any concerns for the household that day.  A few things were brought forth, most having to do with the six feet of snow that had accumulated in the garden around the Protector’s practice tent.  The Protectors and soldiers roster was called out, some grumbling going through the men who thought they were getting too many duty calls.

Focus had changed and scattered.  Laun recognized the meeting end and yelled out, “An extra draft from the ale barrel tonight for anyone who catches a rat!”  There was a small cheer and the household went to do what they were going to that day.

Laun sat and waited for the people who did not bring things up in meeting to come to her.  It always happened, annoyingly.  Laun finished off the buttered bread before the first person approached her.  One of the kitchen staff had a blush going over her face as she came up to Laun.  A hand was held out and the woman sat next to Laun.

There was a shy look in her eye that Laun was not used to.  Deni was as forward as her hair was red.  It took a moment and some glances around before the kitchen staff said, “Do you think I can go to the Capitol City with the next group of people?”

Laun sat back and looked at Deni.  “What brought this up?  Need to tire out a whole city now?”

There was a wide smile of her face as Deni said, “I was hoping to catch up with the messenger from that man...”

Laun nodded.  “Liam’s man, Nesil.  I thought he was looking a bit worn around the edges when he went back.”

There was a bit of a shove from Deni to her Lady.  “You always say to keep visitors happy.  He was telling me about some of the places he and his Master have been over the last few years.”

Laun kept smiling, but she thought of the trade she had made with Liam.  He was a smuggler, and a high-priced one, too.  His services had been used to get the body of Sand Master out of the Sand Castle and out of the Capitol City.  His price had been a week.  A week of Laun’s time and a week with her body to do as he wished with it.  Laun was sure he was not going to be kind.  Nesil had come to say that the planned time had to be delayed as Liam had other business that had come up.  Then the first snow of the season came and the messenger was stuck with them until the first good lull.  A large group of people went to the Capitol City in that lull from Salam-Dir, including the messenger.

“Deni, if you wish to go, I will not stop you, but be aware that Liam is a person who travels often.  He may not be in the Midlands, let alone the Capitol City until Spring.”  Laun put a hand on the woman’s arm and saw a slight moment of melancholy.

There was a nod.  “I understand.  I would still like to see the city.”  There was a tone that Laun was not sure how to read.  It sounded like hope over sadness.

“If you are in search of this man, I will encourage you to go.  Just know within yourself why you are going.”

Deni smiled and said, “I think of him every day, Laun.”

“Then you will need to go.”  Laun opened her arms and Deni hugged her, more than a peck on the lips to seal the small negotiations.

Deni curtsied to Laun before bouncing slightly off to her duties in the kitchens.  Laun liked the happiness she had within her, the smiles in her wake showing that it easily spread through the household.

Others approached, each with something important to them.  Some were minor things, some were issues that effected the household.  Laun listened to all who approached, talked with them and decided on actions.  Sometimes that action was to send them to someone else, but it was still an action.

By the time the last person had approached Laun with their needs, the nooning meal was being brought out onto the sideboard.  The children in the corral made with several benches along one wall were given bread and water if they could hold it, a breast if they could not.  Ash and Sable both nursed for a few minutes before being given trencher bread to suck and chew on.  Laun was glad of it because Ash was starting to have her teeth poke through and it was becoming uncomfortable to nurse.

She was tired.  Tired of nursing the babies.  Tired of snow every few days.  Tired of the same faces around her, even though she loved most and respected all.  Tired of not being able to ride her palfrey.  Just tired.

In the middle of Winter, that is a problem in the country.  Little diversions were needed and Laun was just about out of ideas.  Digging tunnels through the snow to Lady Hellon’s Hill had taken several days, the bonfire they had burned lit the trees and sky for hours while there were voices raised and companionship shared.  The cleaning out of the old sleeping chamber to make it the open permissive room again for the household was undertaken by many, and then used by many more, as the sounds of sexual pleasure could be heard coming from the room at most times of the day.  The rabbit hunt during one of the slight thaws had given them a day’s hunt, a night’s meat and soon more cured furs to make mittens or hats from.

Laun was out of ideas.  And motivation.  She loved her husbands and was mystified on occasion why they loved her.  Or put up with her.  It was nice when they made love with her.  It was pleasant when others of the household showed interest and surprising at this point when they went through with the flirtations.  The soldiers were sometimes fun, and they seemed more loyal after she had spent time with them.  But... She just wasn’t feeling the excitement or the need for sex.  It worried her.

As Laun went through the keep’s kitchens, touching shoulders and talking a little with people as she went through, Laun kept thinking of the lifetime of experience she had been given in a year and a half.  From slave dancer for Lord and Lady Salam-Dir all the way to Princess of the Realm of the Midlands, and then some.  She was tired of being in charge.  Of having people look to her when most of the time she still did not know what she was supposed to be doing.  She just looked at the information, the situation as she could see it and asked questions.  It seemed the way to keep others going.

But...

What questions did she have for herself?  If she dwelt on it too long, the Darkness would bubble up and try to take her over.  It had been in check for a while, the faces of those having died still there if she pushed it, but not looking at her every time she closed her eyes.  Every question brought up doubt in herself.  There was an itch in the back of her mind, a need to try to better herself, to continue the growth that had been forced on her after the coup had touched the household.  She just didn’t know what way she could grow.

It was chilly in the covered tent walkway from the door into the garden to the large practice tent.  The chill was refreshing to Laun, though Ali was shivering as she followed along.  “You don’t have to come out if you don’t want.  I just need more activity today.”

Ali smiled and nodded.  “Thank you, Highness.  I’ll try to stick it out.”

There were many bodies moving in the tent.  Boxes put up over the tender rosemary and other plants that Orgia wanted saved were being used as benches by those waiting to practice, and those repairing armor and harnesses.  Laun saw that the main weapon of choice that day was double sword.  She smiled, thinking of the last time she had used her wooden practice swords for double, Silar not seeing the one coming into his shin as she had feinted towards his head.  He had whapped her a good one too, but it was not as big of a bruise as he had complained about.  It did not show well on his dark skin, but it had made him limp for over a week.

One of the soldiers in the group drew in a breath and was about to call for salute.  Laun raised a hand and he did not call out, letting the breath out as a loud sigh and slumping his shoulders as he went back to stitching on a padded gambeson for his armor.  The smell of sweat was already thick in the tent, but it just made Laun more ready to join them.  Laun nodded to many of those in the tent and went to the sergeant who seemed to be in charge of the weapons that day.

“Highness?  Come to put more of us on the sick roster?”

Laun had a smirk and shook her head.  “You would think the highly trained military of the Midlands would be able to defend themselves against a small girl as myself.”

There was a snort from the Sergeant.  “Shall we get you into padding so you can join us?”

The padding created from blankets and sheep skins was strapped on her over her tunic and breeches.  A cloth was wrapped around her hair to keep her braid up and padded gloves were on her hands.  A flash of some fear went over a protector’s face, his hand going to his arm where she had hit him hard enough to keep him from working for a week.  Laun smiled and put her hands out to the Sergeant, two wooden swords given to her.

Laun knew that the men and women in the training group that day were coddling her.  She felt the pulls on the practice swords as they hit her, barely a tap as they touched.  She also tried to go at half speed and pull her hits, but once she was into a good sparring match, sometimes she forgot.

Her own hands held the Private’s arm as Pillar put a splint on it.  Her hands shook from the adrenaline going through her, and the shame of possibly breaking the man’s arm.  Snow dug out of the snowbank up against the canvas of the tent was pressed on the bruised and swollen place, the shamen giving Laun a look that made her want to run and hide.

“This is the third soldier you have broken in the last week.  Will you please stop it?  We only have another two squads for you to go through.”

“Yes, sir.”  Laun put a cold hand on the man’s forehead and saw the Private’s pain clearly on his face.  “I am so sorry!  I didn’t mean to do that!”

He swallowed and whispered, “If my Princess wishes to have my blood it is hers.”  He closed his eyes briefly and then had a small smile as he said, “I wouldn’t mind if your Highness would comfort me, after I heal a little...”

There was laughter in the tent as Pillar had the man brought into the relative warmth of the keep.  Laun stood and started unbuckling the straps to take her padding off, but was stopped by a hand on her shoulder.  She turned and saw one of the other soldiers, practice sword in hand.  “Highness, I hope you aren’t stopping yet.  I still have a few bruises from last time, but I think I’m up to it.”

Laun could not hide the surprise on her face.  “I don’t have the control.  I don’t trust myself to-”

“Highness, that is why we practice.  Defend yourself.”  Laun had to back up as a half-hearted swing came towards her.  She redid the straps and picked up the wooden swords, finding she was defending herself from a full speed press from the man.

There were more bruises on him, and a few on her, before they both waived off another round to be able to catch their breaths.  The smell of sodden padding and moist leather was strong in the tent, the sweat coming off of Laun not pleasant even to her nose.  Laun’s opponent strongly patted her on the back as they went to one of the box benches to sit and recover.

“Your reach is surprising, Highness.”  The Corporal leaned on his knees and looked at Laun in a sideways fashion.

“It’s all in the hips.”  Laun saw him glance down to her still padded hips and back up to her eyes.  He smiled but did not say anything that was obvious.  “Corporal Tivus, you have a good strike, yourself,” Laun said, a hand going to one of her thighs.

She saw the small smile before he said, “I’ve been taught to press the advantage when I see it.  Though with you, Highness, you usually have all the advantage for the press.”

Laun straightened slightly and put her hand to the middle of her back, trying to stretch out a slight sore spot.  “Any advantage is fleeting, so I find you have to press often to get to the position needed to do the job.”  His eyebrow went up and she saw that his mind was traveling in the same direction hers was.

“Sometimes I find that several positions are needed to-”  There was a slap on the back of the Corporal’s head and he swore before turning around and seeing the Lieutenant standing beside him.

“Corporal, banter if you must with our Princess, but you were supposed to be at muster for guard change.”  Senri crossed his arms over his chest and scowled at the man.

The Corporal stood and saluted his commanding officer and then Laun before trotting over to the arms Sergeant to get the padding off.  Senri made a half-hearted salute to Laun before sitting down next to her.  Laun smiled at him and just looked at him.

It took a moment, but Lieutenant Senri flinched and said, “I hate it when you do that, Highness.  You make me feel as though I did something wrong and I start trying to figure out what.”

“Other than doing your duty and keeping a potential playmate from me, nothing that I can think of, Lieutenant.”  Laun smiled wider and put her hand on his leg.

“If I had the time, Laun, I would love to.  But the men have been slacking, and you are no damn help when it comes to keeping them focused.”  His hand went over hers and she felt his warmth and comfort with her.

She nodded and said in a low voice, “I could always try to sequester myself and keep this distraction away from them...”

He leaned forward slightly and said quietly, “I know first hand that keeping you sequestered does nothing to keep your distractions down.”  He looked like he wanted to lean more and kiss her, but straightened up again and took in a deep breath.  “Highness, one of the messages Geralk presented me with was a request from General Alsen to change out squads again.  Once the snow has cleared from this storm, I am thinking of trying to get Halsten’s squad on the road.”

Laun sat back slightly and thought for a moment.  “I thought they were going to be the next in the rotation to Nestwood.”

Senri blinked and nodded.  “I forgot about that.  I’ll look at the roster and see, but perhaps sending them to Nestwood and then Bleck’s squad to the Capitol City directly from Nestwood would work.”

Laun nodded and said, “It is entirely up to you, Lieutenant.  It sounds like a good way to deal with the General’s request.”

Senri nodded and then had a fleeting scowl.  “You did it again.  I think I am catching onto that thing you do, Laun.  But yes, it is a good idea.”

She smiled and raised her hand to his cheek, a very familiar and inappropriate action if they had been anywhere but on the Salam-Dir lands.  “You came to the conclusion yourself, Senri.  I only opened the possibility to you.”

“Highness, many things have been opened to me...  No.  I cannot go there right now.  I have other things to do.”  The officer stood and saluted, waiting for Laun to salute back before he relaxed and went on his way.

Laun slumped forward and put her elbows on her knees.  In many ways, she was glad that she had not had an offer from the military men.  She was tired.  Not just from the sparring, and her shoulders told her she needed to stretch out more next time, but tired of the game.  The back and forth beforehand was tiring, trying to find metaphors that worked for the situation.  It was tiring trying to keep the enthusiasm up on the way to someplace at least partially secluded.  The act it’s self was getting tiring.  She could remember the last three orgasms she had, and they were not in the last week.

There were legs next to her.  She had been looking at nothing in particular in the straw covered mud and had not noticed until there was a clearing of a throat.  Laun looked up and saw Hazalam, waiting.

She looked at her assassin and waited.  She was even tired of this.  “Mistress, the babies would like to be nursed.”

Laun nodded and held a hand up, her man helping her to stand, with only a small wince as her odor was forced past his nose.  The padding went back to the Sergeant, a few words with him about the man she had wounded.  Laun followed Hazalam out of the tent and into the keep, going through the motions of greeting those along the way.

He stopped and motioned to the laundry area.  “I think at least a clean tunic before going into the Great Hall...?”

She nodded.  The sweat soaked tunic came off and into a pile before her man took a cloth and wiped her down, removing some of the salty layer and odor.  A clean tunic went on and Laun led the way to where her babies were being kept.

Ash heard Laun and started to cry.  Sable caught her sister’s cry and soon more of the babies were howling.  It wasn’t even a type of cry that meant pain or being uncomfortable.  Ash had started to demand being fed first and fussed and cried if she thought Sable was going to have Laun before her.

There was a moment where Laun almost picked up Sable, just to show the larger girl that fussing does not get you what you want.  Then Laun thought to herself that it was a baby, a child that could not talk, though Laun had seen her use some of the signs that the Protectors and Soldiers used with her chubby little fingers.  Laun picked up Ash and drew the tunic back, the child latching on before Laun was seated on the bench.

The other children became quiet and Laun knew that bode ill once the children were old enough to plan things.  Sable was smaller, more delicate and received more attention because of it, but Ash had the brashness of a leader already.  If she could incite the others to cry and have them stop when she did...  Laun winced slightly and looked down at her baby.

It took a moment to force the hungry child to unlatch.  Laun ran her fingers along the upper gum in Ash’s mouth and found a small sharp bit.  Laun sighed and let Ash finish nursing before being given Sable for the other breast.

“Early teeth.  I just hope she doesn’t try to bite things off,” Laun said to the other mother who had the duty of looking after the ten babies of Salam-Dir for the day.

There was an answering nod and a piece of dry trencher bread was handed to the child to teethe on.  Sable did not have the little sharp nubs, yet, and Laun was happy about that.  Laun held onto her child for just a little longer than it took to nurse her and then handed her back to the baby sitter.

She did not get up and move from the bench immediately.  She watched as the babies crawled around on the rug put in the enclosed area.  Some were asserting dominance even at a few months old.  Laun reached down and picked up one of the smaller babies that was being pushed around by a larger baby and held him for a while.  He was full of energy and he wanted to grab Laun’s braid.  Such a small person and he already had half the strength of his mother.

Laun put the baby back and left the mass of wiggly youngsters in the good hands of the one mother.  She started through the keep on her way to her room, a few people talking with her along the way about various household things.  Ali trailed behind, Hazalam next to her.

There was a journal she had started and she wanted to keep to the habit of writing in it every day.  She sat and thought of the poor soldier she had bashed and wrote a few lines about that.  It was not coded, there were no dots or slashes by the names.  She did not have the mind to try to do that as Lady Hellon had in her journal.  She really had little reason to.

Little reason.  A small bubble from the darkness that hid in the corners of her mind popped and made her sigh.  She was not really needed in the household, at least that was what she felt like right then.  She knew some of everything the household members did, but could not do any of them well herself.  Others were stronger and could do more to keep the household maintained and protected.  Far more were smarter than she, though she knew she did not know things and asked, keeping those who knew more moving and learning so she would never catch up.  Laun looked up and smiled at Ali and knew there were those who were more beautiful than she, even the late bloomers such as her stablehand.  Laun looked at the plain paper in the loosely bound book and sighed.  She was even tired of being depressed.

Most days were like this.  Small distractions to keep her going.  Then a nap.  This was one of the worst winters for Laun she could remember.  The year before, she had been pregnant, that had kept her busy with her body changing and the new relationships flowing around her.  Before that, she was a household dancer, practicing for most of the day, even in the middle of winter.  Not having anything specific to do was starting to get on her nerves.

Yes, a nap.  Then it would be time to go to evening meal and listen to the same stories and the same songs from the same voices...

Laun shed her clothing, a pile on the floor left with little regard or ceremony.  She felt the new bruises and shrugged them off, the scars she had all over her body having been far worse than a few black and blue marks.  She climbed into bed and Ali slid in behind her, looking relieved that sleep was coming to her soon.

“Love, you know you can be other places.  You don’t always have to be at my side.”

Ali put her arm over Laun’s shoulder, bringing the covers over both of them and said, “Lady, there are few places I would rather be.”

Laun smiled.  “Rest well, then.”  Laun closed her eyes and listened to Ali’s breathing as the fatigue she had been fighting brought a rhythm to it that was comforting to Laun.  It was always easiest for Laun to sleep when others were relaxed and sleeping around her.

She was even tired of that.

 

Onto Chapter 2 , where Spring brings travel plans