the Leathermines

Back to Chapter 15

 

Her body was almost doing what she wanted.  Her body was once again hers, but the baby on her breast made her rethink that thought.

It was early in the morning and she had woken to Sable’s cries for food and attention.  She rolled out of bed and started to do a dance along the window as Sable was held against her side and Laun moved to keep her back and legs happier.  She was relearning her balance, her strength almost completely gone in the last month of the pregnancy.

Sable was putting a strain on Laun’s arm, but not any more than a shield would have.  Laun moved her other arm as if she had a sword in her hand.

She stopped.  Why should she pretend to be something she wasn’t?  She held the baby to her and looked out the window.  The grayness was brightening, but it was still way too early in the day.  She had not had anyone in the bed or room with her, again.  A part of her was hurt that even her assassins chose to stay out of the room.  It had been several days since the scouts had left with the Mason and the Troupe had left, Hunter among them.  Wanda had cried on Laun’s shoulder for a while right after, but had seemed to be holding up well since then.

Laun started to move again, her right leg feeling as though it wanted to go to sleep as she stood there.  She did a few bends, not too deep, and lunged, Sable still nursing though the movement.  Her foot swept to behind her and she turned, almost stumbling when she saw someone kneeling on the floor at the end of the bed.

“Please, don’t stop, Mistress.”

She held Sable and leaned against the stone below the windows.  “No real point for me to do it.”

Silar bowed his head and the tone in his voice was tinged with awe as he said, “You are like Agntha, the Warrior Mother Goddess from my homeland.”

“Never a warrior.  I was just playing at it.”  Laun strode past the dark man and put the child into the cradle on the other end from Ash.

Silar stood and leaned on the bedstead.  “If you weren’t a warrior, you would not have saved your household.”

“I didn’t know what I was doing.  I was just surviving.  I have been living a lie for a year.”  Laun turned from the sleeping babies and went back to the window.  She was wearing nothing.  Even her hair was down, unbound by thong or ribbon.  As a slave should be.

Silar came up behind her and put a hand on her arm.  “Mistress...  You are tired.  But, you are a warrior and have been before you were forced into it.”

Laun slowly pulled her arm from his light grasp.  “No.  I am not a fighter.  And now with the babies, the only thing I seem to be good at has been taken from me.”  She looked down at the belly that had started to sag from not having the babies in it.

His sighed.  “How is your body doing, Mistress?”

The shrugged.  “Hurts.  But I have to keep moving or my legs and back start hurting more.”  She felt him move and almost turned into a blow aimed at the middle of her back.  His hand went past her and he struck out again.

Silar was not pulling his blows.  One blow glanced off Laun’s arm and she knew she was going to have a bruise there before morning meeting.  She ducked and blocked the blows he was aiming at her chest and head, one of the blows coming too close to her cheekbone.

Laun had a flash of anger and found that she was on top of him.  He stopped moving.  She relaxed her hand from his throat and her hand around whatever she had grabbed through his loincloth.  She rolled her knee from his stomach and panted, “Stop this.  I get it.”

Ash started to cry.  Laun pushed herself off of her dark man and went to her child.  She sat and nursed the baby as she caught her breath.

Silar sucked in his breath.  His voice was soft as he said, “You are a warrior.  You are a mother and a leader.  You are my leader, Mistress.”  He was still on the rug, a hand cupping his groin.

“It is going to take a while before I get my mind and body working together.  Sleeping alone for so long is not helping.”

Silar rolled to his side and then to his knees.  His hand did not leave his groin as he moved.  “To be honest, it’s the babies.  They are up all the time and everyone in the household has experience with it at this point.  Give it a few more days and the babies should be sleeping better.”

Laun grimaced.  “Even my Gem and Hazalam are not sleeping with me.”

Silar half-smiled.  “Mistress, they have been keeping an eye on Evan for you.  And...well...”

Laun turned away slightly, Ash fussing and almost loosing the nipple for a moment.  “Don’t tell me.  I don’t want to know.”  Laun did not like the envy that went through her, but it was not the only time it had been through her recently.  It was another layer.

“Has no one...?”

Laun did not answer.  Silar knew that he had not been with her.  There had not been anyone else in the room when he came in at that early hour.  Silar did not know how much it hurt Laun to have only the babies with her.  She felt as though a different punishment was being put on her for something, her mind thinking of many things that could be causing the ostracization, each thought having been worse than the last as she lay alone at night.

Laun would not look at him.  Silar knelt by the bed and looked at her.  They stayed like that, one ignoring the other for close to half an hour, far past when Ash had stopped sucking and was just latched on and sleeping.

Laun could not handle having Silar waiting for her.  She quietly said, “Just go.  I am sure your talents could be put to better use elsewhere than there on the floor.”

He sighed.  As he stood, Silar said, “If you need me, I am just a call away, Mistress.”  He left, pausing outside the door before going down the stairs.

Laun let the tears that were behind her eyelids out.  They dripped on the sleeping baby, making her face scrunch up.  Laun bundled the baby back up and put her in the cradle.  She rocked them both for a few minutes before crawling to the middle of the bed and trying to get comfortable.  She wanted to sleep, to rest.  She was so very tired, physically as well as mentally.

A telltale shuffling of feet outside the door of the room let Laun know that someone was there to see her and they wanted to let her know that they were there.  She turned her head and looked up to see Kell.  The healer was carrying a basket with a few things hanging over the side as she came into the room.

“Laun, I was worried how you were carrying yourself last night.  How are you feeling?”

She watched Kell move a chair and start unpacking things from the basket.  “Tired.  Uncomfortable.  Not feeling...useful.”

Kell had a calm look on her face as she turned towards Laun.  She nodded, a slight grimace coming to her lips for a moment.  “Tired and uncomfortable I can help with.  Have the babies been nursing well?”

Laun sat up and looked into the cradle.  “It seems like every few minutes I am nursing one or both of them.”

Kell sat on the side of the bed and put a hand on Laun’s leg.  “They take lots out of the mother in the first month or so.  Please remember that you do have help.”

Laun turned her head away and mumbled, “Not really.”

Laun did not see the healer’s eyebrows push together.  “Let me see how the cut is healing.”  Only a small push of Kell’s hand prompted Laun onto her back.  Kell brought out a mirror to help reflect light onto Laun’s womanhood, a cloth put under her and a wet cloth to the side letting Laun know that this was going to be a fairly thorough examination.

A light touch on her thigh let Laun know that Kell was between her legs.  Another light touch and there were fingers lightly touching the outside of her womanhood.  There was a slippery, cold sensation and Kell’s fingers were gently probing into Laun.  There was a little pain as the fingers went fairly deep into her to check how things were resetting inside.  Laun just closed her eyes and went to a place she had created before, a place where she did not react to what was going on with her body.  It did not take much to go there.  Laun felt as though she had been partially there for a while.

The touch was gone.  Then a finger gently rubbing on her asshole and there was a pressure and then something inside her ass.  Kell’s finger was gently pulling and pushing on the scar that was forming, the oil being massaged in to help keep the skin supple.  Laun tried to go back into the place with no reactions, but it felt good.  Kell gently placed her thumb on the outside of Laun’s lower lips and pushed in.

The back arched before Laun knew that she was feeling anything.  There was a flash of pain but most of what she was feeling was pleasure.  Laun thought of Aloen, how he had done this and had been turned from his vow too easily.  A tear was at the corner of Laun’s eye as she sighed with the removal of Kells fingers from her.

“I hope that didn’t hurt, Laun...” The healer’s voice was unsteady, uncertain.

There was a shake of Laun’s head.  She closed her legs and rolled onto her side.  Laun felt the healer wipe some of the oil off of her and saw the cloth get tossed to the basket.  The thought of Aloen dragged at Laun, knowing that she had thoughtlessly used him, breaking his vow to himself and his god.

Kell moved up the bed and lay next to Laun to look into her eyes.  “Laun, you are mostly healed down there.  You can safely have sex if you-”

A sob came out and Laun closed her eyes.  She did not want to say anything.  The healer had already done so much for her and the household.  Laun did not want to burden the woman with even more than was already on her trencher.

Laun’s eyes opened in a flash, confusion running through her.  The healer’s hand was on her cheek, their lips pressed together.  A tongue ran across the outside of Laun’s lips but did not break through to inside.

Kell pulled back.  She looked at Laun with first a little confusion on her face and then pure embarrassment.  “I’m sorry.  I should not have done that.”  The healer pushed herself away and off the bed, almost tripping on the cradle.  She threw together the things that had been in the basket and left, not looking back and not saying anything.

Laun was confused at what just happened.  A burst of tears came out and she pressed her face into the bedding.  It was not just that the healer had just run out, it was that Laun did not respond, could not respond.  She felt as though if she let herself feel anything sexual that she was betraying herself.  Or someone else.

The closeness that she thought she had before with people had been an illusion.  She was just a figurehead in the household.  The writ was all that kept them from kicking her out.  They were all repulsed by her now that her weakness was apparent to all.  Her body was misshapen and scarred, any strength she had from when she was a dancer completely gone.  Laun didn’t even want to be around herself.

Both babies started to fuss.  They worked off each other and finally Laun could not ignore them any longer.  She moved on the bed, sighed and sat at the edge of the bed, looking at the babies in the cradle.

She did not really pay attention to what she was saying, but she used her foot to rock the cradle as she talked to them in a sing-song way.  “Shhh.  It’s all right.  You are well.  Both of you working together to get me off my ass.  We will need to train you two to double team those who wish to come between you.  Remember to cling to one another, my littles.  You will need each other in the world you are growing up in.”  She hummed as they started to settle down again.  Sable did still seem a bit fussy.  Laun picked her up and felt both of her breasts to see which one seemed fuller.

They were both full, but not painfully so.  Her bladder seemed to be full, too.  Laun felt more tears coming, but tried to keep them at bay.

Laun coaxed Sable into nursing for a few minutes before putting both of the babies into a sling.  Laun had on a tunic and the babies and went in search of the privy.

It was not as early as she thought.  She had been able to sleep while she was in bed moping but had not realized it.  She was so tired all the time that she could sleep and wake to the babies and not get true rest.  As Laun was in line for the privy, many of the men there were trying to get in and out fast so that Laun could use the facilities without Laun realizing it.

She had to hold the babies a little tighter than they wanted to keep her balance at the split bench over the privy.  It took some odd movements, but she was able to wipe and settle most of her tunic before she stepped out.  She felt a tug on the back of her tunic as one of the men in line made the hem come out of the sling’s tie.  Laun smiled and went on to the Great Hall.

So many people.  She used to be able to name everyone on the lands.  Now, with the mercs Silar had hired, the soldiers and people she had known all her life mixed together, she sometimes had to fake it.  Not always well.  Laun made her way through the people to a clear spot near the middle of the room and accepted a mug of warm milk from the hand of one of the staff.

As with her bladder being full and she had not paid attention, her stomach with very little prompting grumbled at not having more than a few sips of milk to fill it.  A bread trencher was put near her, some preserves and apple slices on it.  Laun took a slice of apple and sucked on it, the fresh tartness clearing some of the bile at the back of her throat from her spat with Silar.  She crunched on it and it was good.

Some of the household came to her, looking at the babies and putting a gentle hand on her shoulder.  She smiled at them and accepted sips of cider and such from other people’s tankards.  She had to move the babies around some when they fussed, but the noise and crowd was familiar to them and they were calm otherwise.

The meeting started after a while.  It had a bit of a lazy pace, not as formal as it had become while the mass of people had been there.  A few announcements about needs in the fields and who to talk to.  A story told about one of the wardsmen and his inability to fish.  A light discussion about a way to rebuild the old, burnt house.  Laun watched as those around her knew what they were doing and used the time to mostly be together, not bringing up pressing needs.

Laun wiped her nose on her sleeve to keep herself from sniffling.  She felt among but not with the people around her.  It was an odd sensation and it made her sad.

She was also tired. Very tired.  The morning meeting faded out, little conversations filling the room, stopping the general attentiveness.  Laun took another sip from her mug and leaned against the table.  She had the babies still strapped to her, asleep and warm against her in the sling.  The general buzz of conversation around her was not directed at her.  She leaned harder on the table and blinked heavily.  Her eyelids were staying down for longer than she wanted.  Then she just didn’t open them for a while.

When Laun woke, her head was propped up in her hand, but she could not deny that she had fallen asleep.  The babies seemed to still be asleep, though at least one of them needed to be changed.  Laun moved and felt her time asleep in an odd position in her neck.  She moved and tilted her head and felt how stiff she was, but it was not painful.  She started to move her shoulders and body around slightly, trying not to wake the babies.

There was more on her trencher.  The small mound of preserves was there.  The apple slices were still there.  There was also a fresh sprig of mint.  And a slice of cold pork.  And a few nuts taken from their shells.  And...

Laun smiled and had a tear at the corner of her eye.  She reached for some of the nuts and found that her milk was re-filled, too.

Looking around at the mostly empty Great Hall, she would not have been able to tell who had come to her and given her offerings while she was asleep, except for at least one lingering look from one of the staff cleaning the fireplaces and one of the other mothers of the household nursing across the room and smiling at Laun.  They must have given her some of it.  Laun smiled and started to eat.  She did not hold her appetite in check.  She ate all of what was on the bread trencher and then started to pull the trencher it’s self apart.

Both of the girls started fussing.  Laun could not ignore that they needed to both be cleaned and changed.  She did not have the cloths with her, but a motion and one of the staff in the room came to her and then was off to the laundry to get what she needed.  One of the laundry tubs was only for the baby’s things at that point.  Seven babies in need of clean things constantly, and more on the way.

Laun had a flash of guilt and jealousy go through her when she thought of Ali and her pregnancy.  The stablehand was so strong to begin with, Laun knew that she was going to come through her own pregnancy without any problems.  It already had given her more curves than she had ever had in her life.  Laun’s face flushed as she thought of Fount with Ali.  She also thought of the other women who were still pregnant.  The laundry was going to be constantly washing the baby’s dirty things for years at this point.  She blinked back a tear as the thought of the babes in arms that had been killed by the bandits…  She shook her head at herself and focused on the babies in front of her.

Laun had some help to clean and change the fussing babies.  The staff who came back with the clean cloths also brought a large basket with a handle, one of the swaddling quilts in the bottom of it, several other blankets in for around the girls.  Laun took Sable and the kitchen staffer took Ash.  Both girls were cleaned and rewrapped in very little time.  They were placed into the basket and Laun was happy to let the basket hold the babies as she sat back down, unburdened.

Laun talked for a few minutes with the man who had helped her.  She had not been able to talk with many people at length for so long that it was nice to reconnect with someone she knew, had been around for several years, but had not really talked with much.  She thanked him for helping her with the babies, his shrug saying as much as his slight bow.

Laun finished both the milk and the trencher as she sat in the Great Hall.  She was certain there were things she could be doing, but she had the constant companions of the babies that weighed her down.  She almost missed the canvass and wood cot in the Great Hall, but also glad she did not actually need it.  Laun stood and did a few stretches and felt the disuse of her body as it complained at her.

Laun saw Wanda come into the Great Hall.  The ward slowed, but did come straight to Laun once she was spotted.

Wanda tried to do a curtsey.  It was slightly awkward and her foot placement was more for a bow than a curtsey.  Laun curtseyed back, her knees giving her warning to not go too low.

“Laun...  I made this for you.”  There was a small pouch hung from twisted straw twine in the girl’s hand, dangling and swinging heavily.

Laun took it and said, “Thank you.  That was very thoughtful.  What is it?”

Wanda sat on the bench when Laun motioned to it and sat herself.  “It is a charm for you to wear.  To help you get better.  And...”  The girl looked down for a moment but looked Laun in the face with a slight blush on her cheeks.  “And for you to have love.”

Laun put the charm on, the slightly scratchy string moving along the back of her neck.  Laun tried to not sneer as she said, “Thank you, but why?”

“You have been so sad.  I want to see your smile again.”

Laun blinked and the tears were there again.  She softly said, “I hope it works.  For both.”  They hugged.

Wanda told of the things that were in the little bag.  Counted seeds and mint mostly, but Wanda would not tell Laun everything that was in it.  “I need to keep some secrets for the charm to work.  At least that is what Gran May used to say.”

“Who?”

Wanda told Laun of one of the women who used to be in the troupe before the coup.  She was killed in the first flush of fighting before they were able to escape.  She was a wise woman and had taught Wanda a few things.

“Have you talked to Pillar and Lucaris?”  Wanda shook her head.  “You should go and find them.  Tell them about Gran May and the charm.  You may have some knowledge that could help them.”

Wanda shook her head.  “I don’t have any good learning about stuff like that.  I just caught on ta a few things.”

Laun put her hand on the girls’ arm.  “One of the things you caught onto may be something that they need.  You are full of information you don’t know.  You may have exactly what the household needs to do something.  You are important and the people who know how to use your information don’t even know you have it.  If you have time, go and find them right now.”

Wanda stood and made a slightly better curtsey to Laun before doing a back flip and turning towards the door to the courtyard.  Laun heard a few appreciative tones if not words between some of the others in the Great Hall as the girl left.

Laun did not feel as alone.

Really, she did not feel alone.  She turned and saw that Verat was quietly standing a few paces away.  Laun turned on the bench and motioned for him to sit.

“Highn...  Laun.  I apologize, I am not used to such informalities.”

Laun smiled.  “Everyone knows.  I don’t have to be reminded about the damned titles.  I would rather be called my given name than the title.  My Father calls me Thorn.  Even my dancer name is preferable much of the time.”

A flash of something was below the surface of his bland smile, but Laun could not read him, yet.  “We all have many names, don’t we.”

Laun could feel him trying to prod, trying the dance of words on her.  But she was tired.  She was not sure what this apprentice was trying to find out.  “Not all of them of our own choosing.”

He nodded slightly.  “Perhaps some names are titles within themselves?”

“Such as the name your Master goes by, or what other Masters hide behind.”  Laun leaned on the table, not more comfortable, but a better position to watch the man from.

He nodded once.  “Some are private names, names for families or lovers.  Some are names for the public to be recognized.  Then there are names that are used more than a title, a signal to others.”

Laun narrowed her eyes.  “Such as those used by other guilds to denigrate those they would use but not acknowledge as peers?”

He tilted his head to the side for a moment and shrugged.  “If it is what they want to see, it is what we will show them.”

Laun saw an opening.  “What do you show, Lord Verat?”

There was almost a wince of a smile.  “Evidently, too much.”

Laun shook her head.  “You have not said anything.  But your manners, the way you present yourself.  From the South?”

He nodded.  “It was different to come to my Master in the Capitol City.  There, the winter was harsh enough.”  He looked around and said, “This will be...”  His voice failed him.

“No easy way to say it.  Hard.  Unless we get supplies and soon, we will have to start making some hard decisions.”

“My Master said that you crack the veil.  You know the way to play the game, too.”

She shrugged slightly.  “I have found that one needs both to be able to get to what you need.  Subtlety will not defend the barricade.”

His eyes went wide.  Many pretensions vanished and a slight accent came to his voice as he said, “I can believe that Rosemond would be trying t’ push, and try to get to Salam-Dir and you.  Ya don’t know all what they are willing to do.”

Laun put her hand on Verats knee.  “You do.  So does your Master.  You are as safe here as anywhere.  Moreso depending on from what.”

His eye went to her hand.  He blushed and looked back to her eyes.  “Lady, I have been told of your...appetites.  I am honored, but-”

Laun smiled.  “You have different appetites.  You should know I am apt to touch.  It is one thing I have found that takes down personal armor easier than anything.  Has your Master not taught you that?”

He looked at her hand, still on his knee and said, “I have been taught how to use certain talents to get information, but that is after closing the door to the bedroom.”

“Used.  As a gift.”  Laun saw a clench of jaw muscles.  “Here, under my roof, you are a gift, but one only you get to give.  There have been a few wardsmen looking your way since-”

He flushed.  His voice was soft.  “I do show too much.”

“If you wish to meet those who are interested, I can arrange it.  There are ways in the household, and ones preferences are not held against you.”

He looked up and he looked childlike.  “It’s not that I haven’t been with women, Lady - Laun.  For my Master, I have been with many.  But I...”

Laun smiled.  “You do not have to explain.  You do not have to make excuses.  What you like is what you like.  It is nice to know that you do have both experiences, though.  It makes some things easier.”

His eyebrow went up and some of his mask came back.  “Laun?”

“You will not be asked to do things you are not willing to do.  Mostly.  We sometimes have...gatherings within the household.  It becomes quite free.”  Laun giggled and said, “Where do you think we had all the babies from?”

Laun saw the light flush go to a full blush, red from collar to crown on the man.  “If you say so, Laun.”

Laun patted his knee and lifted her hand from him.  “You are here not just to be safe.  You are here to learn.  I showed Sand a few things, and I think he wishes you to see and understand.  It will be a while before I am up to playing, but you are welcome to watch when I come to myself again.”

He nodded and stood.  “Thank you for talking, Highness.”  He bowed slightly, Laun noting that Wanda should take some lessons from him with the courtliness he presented.  He started to turn and then paused.  “Laun.  What was your dancer name?”

Laun smiled and rubbed her hands together.  “Always looking for information, eh?  This one is free.  I was called Peach.”

He smiled.  “Soft fleshed, soft skinned.  Pleasant to look at and smell, but the pit can break you if you are not careful when you eat.”  He nodded and Laun thought on what he said as he walked towards the wards room.

Laun had not been out of the Castle and keep since the birth.  She had not seen the sun else thru a window.  Not even climbing up to the walkway.  She was not up to going to Hellon’s Hill, but there was the garden.

The babies were startled when the basket was moved, but they settled down, Sable going back to sleep and Ash looking around her.  Laun stopped in the kitchens, smiles and nods going her way as she talked to Disa.  There needed to be another naming ceremony, and if it were to be held on the Hill, and to become a celebration after, it would be good for everybody.  A few initial thoughts went from Laun to her maid, some depending on if there were supplies coming in with Hunter in a few days.

Laun made her way through the kitchen, touching shoulders and having a few words here and there.  Loving looks were given to the babies, fingers offered to Ash to hold, fingers stroked along Sable’s dark hair.  Laun made it through and out to the garden.

It was bright.  And warm, but not as humid as the last time she had been outside.  She walked past a few people digging in the dirt, harvesting and thinning and planting.  There were waves and calls to Laun as she went by.  Laun saw that the shed that had been built was being used as a potting shed, an old half-barrel being used to mix dirt before small plants were placed gently in earthen pots.

Laun walked past the raised platform that went the length of the wall that kept the garden from the rest of the lands.  There was one protector walking the platform, looking out past the cleared area and into the old trees.  He turned and waved, turning back to his duty after Laun smiled and waved back.

She made her way to the rose arbor against the back of the tower wall.  There were a few rose petals clinging to the growing rosehips.  Laun thought of the rose hips and rose petal jam she would share with Lady Hellon in the past.  It was another resource they needed to use, once the rosehips were fat and red in about a month.  The babies were put on the ground in the shade and Laun sat on the stone bench.

She could watch the rest of the garden from there.  It was not the coolest place to rest, but the shade and slight scent of roses was pleasant.  Ash was looking around and Laun could see her wiggling in her blanket.  Sable was asleep and looking very peaceful in the slightly moving shade.

Laun leaned back and relaxed.  Then she moved away from the wall again.  Something had poked her.  She looked and could not see anything in the browned ivy that had climbed the wall.  Laun leaned back again and was again poked in her back.

Laun ran her hand along the stone and brick of the wall.  Something caught at her hand from beneath the foliage.  She scraped the dead and dying ivy from the wall and found a small, old piece of metal wire coming from between the old stone and the newer brick.  She pulled on it and it broke, but not before moving out slightly, exposing less corroded iron through the sandy mortar.

“Littles, it looks like I found another hiding place.”  Laun looked at the crumbling mortar around the brick.  She remembered when the repair had happened about five, six years before.  There had been a storm or something and the wall had to be rebuilt.  It looked like it may need to be rebuilt again, after she found out what the iron wire was attached to.

She went back out into the garden and went to the shed.  There were a few tools there and she asked if she could borrow a few.  The person with her hands in the dirt nodded and smiled, watching as her Lady went back to the rose arbor with trowel and blade in hand.

More of the ivy was scraped off, the roots pulled from the ground beneath the bench.  The roots of the ivy were not as tenacious as the curly tendrils that had wound their way into the mortar.  It took a while to clear off the area that had been repaired.  The tan brick had held up better than the mortar.  The strands of pulled plants were dumped on the ground in the sun outside the arbor and Laun looked at the wall.

This part of the wall was not part of the tower.  It was an extension out from the tower and should have abutted the inner courtyard.  Laun thought and the other side did not have the brick.  The courtyard had never been repaired, to the best of Laun’s knowledge.  There had to be another secret.

Laun used the trowel and the blade to scrape at the loose mortar.  Several of the bricks had very little keeping them in, a green stripe down the wall from between several bricks showing where moisture had been staining the area for a long time.  Laun was able to pry the first brick out after about ten minutes.  A cool, musty waft of air came from the hole.  She loosened more of the bricks and was able to take out enough to make a sizable gap in the wall.  Laun pulled at an iron netting that was helping to keep the bricks in place and looked into the hole.

It looked like there had been a small water catch basin there at one time.  There was the ragged edge of a bowl inside the hole covered by the brick.  A small alcove had been there, but Laun could see where the original wall had shifted or broken, the brick just making the alcove more stable and flattening it to the rest of the wall.

Laun thought back.  She did not remember there ever being anything but a flat wall there.  The repair she remembered must have been the second, or perhaps even third, repair on that section of the wall.  She would need to show Lonn that, once they were back from Nestwood.

All that thought was just in a moment for Laun as the old, broken alcove held a wooden box that had caught all of her attention.  It was blackened from moisture, a slight green tinge to it as Laun used the blade and trowel to pull it out from the hole.  It was heavy and it took effort to not drop it to the stone of the bench.

The lock was not hard to get around.  The wood broke as soon as Laun put any pressure under the lip of the lid.  Inside, there was an oilcloth, not in the best condition, but secure around a bundle.

Laun looked at the babies and saw that both were asleep.  Laun pulled out the heavy oilcloth and tried to put it on the bench beside her.  The string holding it was rotten and fell off as she moved.  The cloth slid and the contents spilled, metallic sounds ringing through the garden.

Orange.  That was what she saw at first.  And then she saw that it was not just orange, it was golden and orange and copper and silver...  Coins and a few jewels and some jewelry had spilt out and around Laun.

Laun remembered something.  She smiled, even though it came from a torn heart.  Lady Hellon had shown her some coins at one point, years ago.  She said that it was for the direst of emergencies.  That no one need know of it until it was time to be used.

“It is that time, my Lady.”  Laun started to pick up the coins and jewels, deciding on the fly to put them into the basket with the babies.  Laun smiled.  “You are rich enough to sleep on beds of gold, but so poor we have to beg for our next meal.  This is such a cruel world, my littles.”

One of the gardeners approached the arbor.  “Laun?  I heard something.  Do you need help?” He stayed on the green side of the arbor as Laun and the babies took all of the space on the shade side.

Laun continued to pick up the coins as she said, “I seem to have found a hole in the wall.  I was just clearing the dead ivy, and the brick started to give way.”  Laun picked up and threw the iron mesh out of the arbor, the metal hitting a piece of stone and making a clanking sound before coming to rest on the path.  “That was inside to help keep it supported.”

When the coins and jewels were all collected, as far as Laun could tell, she put the remains of the box under the stone bench and came out holding one of the bricks.  “As you can see, the mortar was crumbling.”

The gardener put his head around the trellis for a moment and nodded at the hole.  “I remember when it was fixed.  Seven or eight years ago?”

Laun shrugged.  “I think so, but I am not sure.”  She turned as if looking at the hole, really trying to see if she had missed any of the treasure.  “I hope that the Mason and his crew have time to do something about this while they are here.”

The gardener took the brick from Laun and hefted it.  “This is the same brick that was used to fix the chimney at the same time.  If the wall was fixed but now coming down-”

Laun nodded.  “I have already been talking to Lonn about the chimneys.  He is concerned about where it comes together with the roof.  He doesn’t want to fix the stone and brick of the chimney and make a hole in the roof.”

“Always seems to lead down that path, doesn’t it.  Well,” the gardener said while handing the brick back to Laun, “since you are well, I will get back to the radishes.”

Laun smiled and was glad that there weren’t any big questions.  She did not know why she needed to keep it quiet, but she did.  Laun stacked the five bricks next to the bench.  Even if the mortar had not been sound, the bricks still were.  They were there to be reused, if possible.

Laun was tired from the work.  She sat again on the bench and rested, a shoulder next to the opening.  A slight drip came down on her shoulder and as she looked up into the hole, a drop formed on the inside edge of the brick on the top of the hole.  She thought she could see where water had been running, drop by drop, for quite some time, trying to fill a basin that was no longer there.

Sable wiggled.  She was awake but not crying immediately for a nipple.  Laun lifted the girl up and held her.  She watched the green, or perhaps brown, eyes try to focus on Laun.  Laun hummed and stroked the baby’s cheek, rocking slightly.  The cool at her back made the arbor more comfortable, even with the slight musty scent that still came from it.

Sable finally started to fuss to be fed.  Laun stood and pulled up the tunic, letting the fussy eater latch as she would before going to sit down again.  She was able to look at the babies in the rose scented shade, a cooling, moist draft at her back and look out into the sun of the day without hardly a strain to her neck and back.  While the weather lasted, this was going to be a favorite place for Laun to go.

One baby finished feeding and burping and was being stroked on the face as the other one started to fuss.  Sable was rebundled and placed back in the basket.  Coins slipped into the space left by Ash, the baby wiggling free of her blanket before she was settled to suckle.

Laun saw several figures come into the garden and the cloth around Ash was put into the basket, covering the coins.  The assassins.  Four assassins.  The protector on guard nodded to them and went back to his walking along the platform.  They came into a fairly open space and seemed to be talking.  Laun watched as Silar and Evan stepped back to let Gem and Hazalam face each other on the gravel path.

They danced.  They had been practicing the sword dance and Silar had shown them the balance form that he had created.  Gem was the attacker, her hands positioned with an invisible blade, her blonde braid whipping around her as she went through the form.  Hazalam defended, flowing around the smaller assassin until the step in and strike.

Laun felt the movements.  It was one of the cane dances that had been changed as she learned how to use the sword, her body, and her mind together.  It was the first time she had seen both sides of the form from the outside.  It was beautiful.

Silar smiled and put his arms across his chest.  He was wearing slightly more than he had been in the full summer heat.  The short tunic and loincloth were bright against his dark skin and seemed to flash as he waived the fourth assassin to the path.  Evan’s body language made it look like he did not wish to do what he had just been shown.  He motioned to the arm still in the sling.  His feet seemed to be heavy.

Silar backed off slightly, his hands raised palm side towards the man.  Laun knew that gambit of his.  Evan relaxed and then found that Silar was charging him.  The strikes that did not meet with the still healing man forced the defending form from him.  Silar stopped after just a few movements.  Laun could see Evan’s chest heaving and his good hand up.

Then Laun saw something she had taught Gem, unintentionally.  The blonde stepped forward slightly and put her hand out.  The tilt to the head made Laun see a slight wickedness, but also an appealing and enticing gesture.  Evan took Gem’s hand and words were exchanged.  Laun saw Hazalam still himself slightly, but his posture, his face did not change.

The newest assassin nodded.  Gem dropped his hand and put her palm to his cheek.  She smiled.  Laun was proud of the girl as Evan stepped back and took first position for the dance against Silar again.

The dance was slow and awkward.  It was not as even and flowing as it had been with the first couple.  Evan picked it up, step by step.  Laun saw that he had feet that wanted to stay on the ground.  It was hard for him to move from one part of the form to another.  It was going to be something to work on.

Ash was just looking up at Laun, not really nursing.  It was easy to let her stay there, but Laun’s ass was on the cold stone of the bench and was getting a little chilly.  The girl was unlatched and Laun stood to let the tunic drop.  She stepped out of the arbor and leaned against the wall, still watching the practice while holding the baby in her arms.

It wasn’t his feet.  Laun watched the movements of the men.  It was his knees.  One of his knees was not working as well as the other.  Laun started forward towards the practicing men and stopped about five paces away on the path and waited.

Ash was the one to bring attention to Laun, a series of tiny sneezes coming from her as she squinted at the bright light in the garden.  Hazalam and Gem knelt in her direction, Silar paused in the form and Evan looked confused for a moment until he turned to see Laun.  Silar followed the other’s movement to the gravel beneath him, Laun suppressing a smile when she saw a wince when the gravel pressed into his knees.  Evan was the last to the ground and Laun saw that, yes, his left leg did not move as well as his right.

They waited.  Laun felt a slight thrill at the power she had right then.  She stepped forward and smiled at them.

“You are doing well, Evan.”

His head went down and he looked at the ground.  He seemed to be embarrassed about something.  “Thank you, Mistress.”

The thrill went through her again.  Her smile became wider and most of her teeth showed.  “I know it is not something that you would be taught in another house, but the forms are good practice for the body.  It keeps things limber and your body awareness up.”  Laun stepped just a little closer and put Ash against her shoulder to burp the slightly wiggly baby.  “What is wrong with your knee?”

His head came up and Laun saw a flash of embarrassment again before his mask went up.  “Nothing I cannot handle, Mistress.”

Laun stepped to in front of him and tilted her head to the side, her smile fading slightly.  She hoped she was up to what she wanted to do.  “Wrong answer.”

He was on his back gasping as Laun’s foot had struck his good shoulder and she had followed through with a knee in his stomach pinning him to the gravel path.  Laun looked to Silar and asked, “What is wrong with his knee?”

Gem stood and took Ash from Laun as the dark man answered, “I do not know, Mistress.”

Laun rolled off of Evan and let him breathe for a moment before holding a hand out to him.  He took it and they used the steadiness from each other to stand.  Laun took Ash back and rocked the girl as she looked at Evan.

Hazalam was the one to venture an answer by saying, “We were a little rough last night, Mistress.”

Laun nodded, a flash of something bitter going through her.  “That is a better answer.  Learn, Evan, that I like to know how people are doing.  Not just for the social contact, but to be able to use the person as the need arises.”

His head bowed and Evan said, “I think I understand, Mistress.”

“Good.”  Laun stepped back a pace.  She looked at Silar and squinted slightly at him.  “The second open hand form you taught me...  Could that be modified for a static stance?”

Silar paused and nodded.  “Yes, Mistress.  I think I see where you are going with that thought.”

The four were up and Silar was teaching an open handed form to all that did not require Evan to move more than a foot width with his feet, or use his slinged arm.  Laun wished to join, but the baby became fussy and wanted all of her attention.  Laun did not see Silar’s smile as Laun rocked with the motions of the form to calm the baby in her arms.

Laun moved back towards the arbor as she calmed the baby down.  Sable was in the basket, a little wiggly herself, moving her head and eyes around to follow the movement of the light through the slightly moving rose leaves.  A wind was starting to come through, not just a breeze.  Laun went to pick the basket up and found it was a little too heavy for her with the one baby in her arm.

Laun stood against the wall and watched the practice again.  They seemed a little self conscious as they moved, a look thrown her way a few times over shoulders.  She made them nervous.  She wondered what about her would make Gem hesitate as she followed the teaching.  Evan, he was still uncertain and Laun wanted to keep him off balance.  Hazalam...  He was being as protective of Gem as he had been of Laun.  There was more than companionship in his positioning, his actions.  He loved the blonde.  He wanted to keep her to himself, but Gem had found an appetite within herself that even Hazalam could not completely sate.  And Silar, their teacher and ad-hoc leader.

The four of them.  A good unit.  Laun saw and felt that they had been physical with each other, and not just in the martial forms.  A unit needed to know each other as well as possible.  Sharing a bed together was one of the ways to do that.

It still left a slightly bitter taste in the back of her mouth.  Laun did not like the feeling of being alone, that others were having things she used to have and now was shunned from having.  But, as Silar pointed out, the babies were her priority.  She was there for them and the rest would have to wait.

It looked like there was a lull in the activities of the assassins.  Laun caught Silar’s eye and motioned him over.  He trotted to her and knelt on one knee in front of her, choosing a dirt area over the gravel path to do so.

“I have need for your strength, if you would, please.”

He stood and held out his hand.  It was not what Laun was after right then, but she would take it.  She stepped close to him and took his hand with the one not holding Ash.  His arms went around her and gently embraced both of them.  His face nuzzled the side of Laun’s and then put a gentle kiss on her ear.

Laun sighed and put her head on his chest.  “This is nice.  I am sorry I blew up at you this morning.”

His hand firmly held her in the middle of her back and he gently squeezed.  “It was unexpected, Mistress, but I should not have pushed.”

She nodded.  “I need to be pushed.  Things have changed and I know it.  But I miss...”  She looked up to see his eyes on hers.

They kissed.  It thrilled her as the power had thrilled her.  She felt it go deeper into her and she sighed as their lips parted.  “I have missed that, too, Laun.”

They kissed again, but Ash was taking exception to the closeness of the two adults.  She started to fuss and Laun stepped away from Silar.

“Well, Ash has reminded me of why I asked you over here.  I have to get both babies into the keep to change them, but I have a little more in the basket then I came out with.”  Laun sat on the bench in the shade of the arbor and drew back the blanket.

She heard Silar gulp.  “Mistress?”

Laun motioned behind her.  “My habit of pulling on odd bits led me to this.  The basket is far too heavy for me at this point.  I may need to have help carrying Sable as well.”  Laun looked at Silar and put her finger under her lip.  “Please, I cannot let anyone else know about this until we get word from the outside.  My Lady Hellon put this here years ago for desperate times.  I think we are there.”

Sable started to cry, leading Ash to fuss and then cry.  Laun stepped out of the shade of the arbor and motioned to Gem.  The three of them came to her, Gem being handed the fussing Ash before Laun picked up Sable, dropping the blanket into the basket.

“Oh, yes!  You are quite wet, aren’t you!  Let’s see if Aunt Orgia has some clean things for you.”  Laun started forward, Silar scooping up the basket and trying to not let it look like it was heavy.  He stayed in the back of the group, Hazalam and Evan following Laun and Gem.

They were at the bathing chamber and Laun motioned to Silar to keep going to the tower room.  Evan showed that he indeed had children before as he helped to clean and swaddle the babies without flinching.  Laun approved and let him hold Ash as she cleaned her self up a little.

Holding the babies while they were in need of changing, working with the bricks and ivy had made Laun grubby.  She pulled the tunic off and tossed it onto the laundry pile and wiped a damp cloth over her to get the majority of the sweat and dirt off of her.  She turned and saw that Evan was pointedly looking away or at the baby, not at her.

Laun grabbed at a tunic and looked at it to see if it would fit.  It seemed small and she started to look for a larger one.  “Mistress, that one will fit you, now.”

She looked up at Gem’s voice.  Laun took another look at the tunic and pulled it on.  She smiled.  Her mind still saw her as being as big around as she was tall, but it was not so any longer.  It was a shorter tunic, too, showing more of her legs and letting the heat of her body out as she moved.

Laun went to hug Gem.  Sable was in the way, but Laun did not care.  “Thank you.  I would not have seen that, ever.”

“You are welcome, Mistress.”  Gem’s head went down in a nod and she did a slight curtsey.  There was not coldness, but aloofness to the assassin’s acceptance of the closeness.

She stepped back.  Laun had been proud of the way Gem had handled Evan, but now she was angry.  She did not know why.  “I am tired.  I’ll need help getting the babies upstairs, but after that, I should not need anyone with me.”

There was a slight relaxing of Gem’s shoulders.  There was relief in the blonde’s posture.  Laun took Ash from Evan and led the way from the bathing chamber.

There were small conversations along the way with people.  A notice of a ripening patch of berries found in part of the woods.  Pillar helping someone who had stepped into some briars and had done more damage to themselves than the bush.  A batch of eggs from the pigeons being brought down to the kitchen.  Several people cooing over the babies as they passed.

It was usual for the household.  They caught Laun’s attention to things as she came near because they did not know when she would be available again.  Laun encouraged it to leave flexibility and informality as a normal way for things to be run.  The morning meetings were a beginning of the day, the small meetings between people a continuation.  

Laun was seeing again that, yes, she was the head of the household.  She did not have to coax or plead or whine with people to get things done.  She suggested.  She pointed out.  She directed to other people.

She was the Lady of Salam-Dir.

 

Chapter 17 - Where Laun rekindles her sexual fire.