the Leathermines

Back to how Laun got in this condition in Chapter 25

 

The dreams Laun had were odd and vivid.  She was in the Great Hall with her people.  They were all celebrating.  She was not sure what they were celebrating and tried to push through the crowd.  She looked up and saw huge night creatures hanging from the rafters watching them.

Laun watched them back and found she was floating above her people and looking one of the night creatures eye to eye.  They looked at each other and she saw blood dripping from it’s mouth.  It spoke to her and told her of the plans it had to eat all her people.

Laun lashed out and felt her hand go through the night creature.  It turned from solid to nothing as her fist connected.  And then she was falling, but not onto the people below.  They had disappeared. The Great Hall had changed to the river and she was in the river.  The water was above her head and she could not breathe!

She had to breathe!  She struggled and her arms pushed the covers to the side and she sat, coughing.

The lights in the room outside the curtained bed were low, but there was a halo Laun saw around every flame that hurt her as she looked at them.  Gem was asleep on the bed next to her, a horse blanket pulled up over her.  Laun turned carefully and saw Ithian in the bed on the other side.  He was wearing a linen tunic that looked a few sizes too large for him as he slept next to her.

Laun’s head was pounding.  She wished she had some of that horrid green elixir from Pillar...  She brought up her knees and pushed her face into the rumpled covers covering them as she cried.  It hurt to cry, but the overwhelming despair and heartache that flowed through her needed some sort of an outlet.

She felt the bedding move slightly and Hazalam was there.  Laun held out her hand and he took it, a strong grip.  Something to anchor to.  She held up her head with her other hand and tried to just breathe.  The tears would not stop, so she did not try.  Her ears had the pounding of her heart running through them, a flash of pain behind her eyes if the heartbeat was too strong.

Her back spoke to her.  Her legs spoke to her.  Her bladder screamed at her.

She made a signal for the privy and Hazalam tried to help Laun out of bed.  Gem had to move.  Laun put her hand on the little assassin’s shoulder and the blonde was awake and sitting.  Laun made the privy signal again and Gem scooted off the side of the bed.

It was a very long way down to the floor that morning.  Laun had to close her eyes and let herself be helped down.  When on the floor, her swollen feet threatened to go out from under her.  It took both of her assassins to get her to the privy.

Gem attended Laun and helped her with cleaning some of the night sweats off as she sat on the ceramic seat.  It was chilly after the damp cloth, but Laun felt refreshed.

Laun made it back out and sat on the bench.  She could see the flowers and other things that the Palace sycophants had sent her.  Laun paused and tried to think why she was feeling that way.  She decided it was left from struggling in the darkness.  She felt alone and the only reason anyone would wish to send her sympathy was to garner attention from Falmir.

A blanket was around Laun and a tankard of clear water in her hand.  She sipped at the water, seeing if her stomach was going to like it.  Moving her mouth was painful, but she drew in the water and the cold on the inside helped to calm the pain.  It felt good going down her throat, too.  Her stomach did not seem to have any problems, so she drank the water to the bottom.

She sat there trying to focus.  Her thoughts were slow and the pain of thinking was getting stronger than the other outer pains.  She had to go back to bed, to sleep.  She reached for help to get up and hands were there.  She was having problems focusing on anything but the next step.  She finally made it into bed and the covers were being pulled up around her.  An arm went around her and a gentle stroke of a hand on her forehead dulled some of the pain.  She fell back asleep, but not to dream.

The voices were low, but she could hear them.  She concentrated.  Falmir.  Bregnan?  A woman...  Engrid.  And Ithian.  They were talking about her.  Was it a dream?  Laun moved slightly and felt the pain, so it wasn’t a dream.

“Is it safe to talk around her?”

Falmir had a sharp tone as he said, “Engrid, I’m sure she knows already.  There is nothing she can do.”

The sweet, soothing and yet alarming voice said, “You really should have dealt with her as soon as she came to the Palace-”

“You touch her and I swear that you will never leave this Palace.”  Falmir had a flat tone to his voice that even Lady Engrid understood.  It was not a threat.  It was a promise.

“Your Majesty.  Your Excellency.  Please.  The tensions between our countries has been rising and we do not need the tensions in this room to stack Sticks.  If we could concentrate on-”

“Ithian, if you don’t shut up, I will lay you out cold, too.”

There was quiet and a little movement.  The bed moved slightly as if someone was leaning on it.

“Bregnan says he is not sure when she will be well.”  Falmir was quiet.

There was another stretch of silence.  Laun had to move a little.  Her legs were feeling odd and she needed to flex.  She was sure that her wince was visible and she let out a small groan before settling down again.  The bed moved again and she felt someone next to her.

She could smell Falmir.  He was strong and the musky oder was both comforting and painful.  His hand was on her belly and she could tell he was looking at her.  She slowly opened her eyes and blinked.

He had not slept.  He had not shaved.  His eyes were as red as fireweed.

Laun thought she probably didn’t look too much better.

“Little thorn, how are you?”

Laun had to smile.  Her mouth was dry, but she was able to say, “I hurt.”

Falmir smiled.  “Do you need anything?”

She stopped smiling.  “For you to stop having council in my chambers?”

He laughed, quieting as he went.  “Anything else, sweeting?”

A tear was in her eye.  She thought of Dreng and how alike and unlike the two men were.  “I want things you will not give me.  And actions you will not perform.  But...  Please, if my people are being so difficult, just leave them alone.”

Falmir’s face changed.  “You knew.”

“Three messengers in three days is hard to conceal, sire.”  She closed her eyes and pushed up the bed slightly.  She was not sitting, but she was a little more propped up.  “Word is that many nobles are leaving for their summer homes before the big heat to make sure you aren’t invading them, too.”

Falmir’s lip curled slightly.  “And who gave them that idea?”

“Not me, sire.  I have not been saying anything against you that they don’t already say to my face.”  She smiled and said, “I can be discreet, you know.”

“Infuriating little wench is more like it.”  He rubbed her stomach through the covers.  He smiled when he felt a movement under his hand.  “He feels well.”

Laun nodded and was unhappy she did so.  She closed her eyes and tried to make the world stop tilting.  “Sire...”  She swallowed.  “I still need rest, but I will be well soon.  You should get some rest yourself.”

Falmir made a negative grunt.  “I did this to you and-”

“And you need to go be the King you claim you are.”

Falmir snorted and smiled.  “Making me pull that yoke even from bed.  Laun, you infuriating, manipulative little bitch.”

Laun smiled.  “You wouldn’t have it any other way.”  She reached up and put her hand on his cheek, feeling the dark stubble under her palm.  “If we were not at odds, I could love you.”

There was a cackle of a laugh from outside the bed.  “So obvious, you tongueless whore?”

Falmir turned red and started to fume.  Laun held his eyes with hers.  Her voice was quiet as she said, “Sire...she lashes out because she is afraid.”  He blinked and was still red, but thought about it.

Laun said louder, “Your excellency, I am sorry that you had to witness such a scene.  It is always hard to see something you cannot have.”

It hit Engrid hard.  “You have no knowledge of what you speak.”  The older woman’s voice was no longer the smooth, calm instrument she played over people.  It was discordant and Laun heard a slight crack at the end.  She also saw the Council General turn her back and look out the window.

Laun closed her eyes as she said, “My apologies again, your excellency.  You, of course are right.  My experience is not as vast as yours, great Lady, and I cannot fathom what you have gone through to gain your rank.”

Ithian stepped in and said, “Perhaps this is not a discussion to be had in anger...”  Laun could hear his steps on the rug.  “Your excellency, there are a few matters of State that I would discuss with you.  Shall I meet you in your rooms in a few minutes?”

Laun heard Engrid turn and walk.  “Do not keep me waiting, mouthpiece.”

Laun opened her eyes when she heard Engrid’s voice in the hall demeaning Gem.  Falmir rubbed Launs belly and shook his head.

“You have made a powerful enemy.”

Laun barely shook her head and said, “We were already enemies, sire.  She just thought she could use me before and tried to keep me within her grasp.  I have been a threat to her since before she knew I existed.”

Ithian leaned into the bed over the footboard.  “I need to go, but I will be back.”

Laun looked into the ambassador’s eyes.  He also had not gotten much sleep, but had held up better than Falmir.  He had pulled on his tunic and had the belt slung over his shoulder.  His hair had not been tended to in days and it was starting to become unruly.

“You also need to tend to your duties.  Soothe her excellency as you know you can.  She needs to know you have not turned from her.  And Rosemond.”  Ithian nodded and left, buckling his belt as he went around the screen.

It was just Falmir and Laun.  Not even a servant.  Laun was tired, too tired to feel the fear she should have.  She hurt and was hungry.  Laun looked into Falmir’s eyes and had a small smile for him.

“Thorn, you are too young to have the wit you do.”

“I was not brought up as a noble.  It was thrust upon me and I did not have the veil of training as even you did.  I see things that are obvious to me and ask.  That is how I get things done in my household.  It is also how I get into trouble.”

Falmir moved his hand from her belly to where he hit her, lightly touching with his big hand.  “And yet, even in pain, all you think about is the safety of your household.  You must love this Edgar Fount greatly.”

Laun felt her face flush.  “Yes, sire, I do.  I did not know I talked in my sleep.”

“Only once, and you were fighting us at the time.  You were trying to protect someone.  You said his name several times.”

“I miss them.”  Laun felt the tear on her cheek before she knew it was in her eye.

Falmir brushed the tear away.  He ran a thumb across her eyebrows and down her nose.  “So like her.  You are your own person, but still...”

“She kept you in check, didn’t she.”  A statement and he nodded.  “You miss her.”

He turned and looked towards the screen across the door.  He turned back and said, “Fuck-all if I don’t miss the old man, too.”  He put his hand on her belly and rubbed it slightly.

“You should have gone hunting with him.”

Falmir leaned back a little.  “How do you know he loved hunting?”

Laun had let something slip.  “Remember, he knew about me before you did.”  She put her hand over his on her stomach.

Falmir nodded.  “You were on the stage with him.”  He supported his head with a hand and looked at her.  “Things were different.”

Laun shook her head and felt a rise in her throat.  She swallowed and said, “It was only a year ago, sire.”

He nodded slightly.  His eyes were down to slits as he said, “It seemed so simple.”  His voice was getting lower and quieter.

Laun talked in a quiet low tone.  “Things done in anger and frustration can seem simple.  Unless you see past and know there are consequences for actions you take, and don’t take, the simplicity will catch you.  Without your foil to keep you balanced, you did not see the pitfalls hidden beneath the surface of your plans.  The people around you encouraged you, used you, and let you think that all would be well after one action on your part.  You did not want to see what would become of yourself, your family, your kingdom.  For even without the seven point crown on your head, it is your kingdom, always was.” 

Laun started to whisper as his eyes fully closed.  “Your actions were your own.  The results widespread.  People you knew are gone.  People you never will know are gone.  There are things you can do for your people, for your kingdom.  You know what they are.  You are so brave to take the weight of the crown upon your head.  Protect your people.  Save your people.  Lead your people from the woods, wolfboy.”

There was a slight upturn to his mouth before it went lax.  He was asleep.

Laun felt sleep close in her mind, too.  But she also thought some as the large man next to her dropped into a snore.  He was there right now, protective because she reminded him of his sister.  Engrid was the Blue Master, one of the Assassin Guild masters, and she was not happy with Laun.  Laun was in danger more than ever.  She did smile at the thought of the Salam-Dir household being a stronghold against Falmir and his Rosemond backers.  But, again, that was not to last.

Laun had a parade of the faces she left behind go through her mind, from Emmy and her father up to her Loves.  She missed them all and hoped that if not safe, then they were protecting one another.  Her eyes were dry, but she felt the tears that should have been falling.

Laun moved a little and Falmir pulled her to him slightly in his sleep.  As she fell into sleep, she thought that he would have been a good father.

 

Into Chapter 27, where Adversary or Enemy is no longer a question